Day 3 of this PMS marathon

This morning started off okay. I was still pretty cranky when I woke up, but I was hopeful that this ugly side of me would have passed and my period would have finnally arrived, but it had not. I found myself irritable, shakey, unable to think or even know what the hell I was doing, angry, and well...I just wanted to bi@tch about everything! It was awful and even more awful for my husband. We were supposed to go visit family downtown today, so I was trying my darndest to get dressed to put this bad attitude behind me and go see my husbands family, but I just could not shake this attitude. I honestly felt like I was going mad. I am really against taking medicine to help with things that I deep down feel like I should be able to deal with, but today I decided to just screw it and I took some ativan to help with the nerves and when that did not work I took some vicodin. I took the vicodin a few times throughout the day and it seemed to make all the difference in the world. I was kinda zoned at first, but then I was actually a decent and somewhat normal human being, who was able to be around large crouds without freaking out. It was kind of nice. I think its pretty pathetic that I had to drug myself to handle life. Honestly, I wanted to hide in my house and not see anyone today, but I was able to overcome. I just feel like this is a very unhealthy way to deal with my problems, since it could easily lead to another problem; being addicted to pain pills or anxiety meds. I really hope that tomorrow will be a better day. I want to feel like a somewhat normal person again; if that is even possible?